Bisexuals Passing As Gay

Click on link for my blog post:

Bisexuals Passing As Gay

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5 thoughts on “Bisexuals Passing As Gay

  1. That was interesting. I personally don’t know any bisexual who IDs as gay; no bisexual that I know would let gay people ‘bully’ them into saying that they’re something that they know they aren’t and as I read your piece, I really didn’t see enough “justification” for doing such a thing.

    I don’t have anything against gay folks… but I wouldn’t ever want to be gay – it’s just as limiting as being straight is and I love the diversity that being bisexual affords me. Yep, I’ve heard the “You’re really gay so admit it!” crap and while it might provide a lot of camaraderie, it’s not worth lying to myself and I certainly wouldn’t want to get into another bunch of arguments when I told all my gay friends, “Look, I’m really bisexual, okay?”

    I know I’d never consider passing as gay… and I’m still wondering why any bisexual in their right mind would. Good writing just the same because there probably are a lot of bisexuals out there posing as gay.

    1. Thank you for your feedback. Everyone has their own life issues to deal with and while you and I are able to be strong and confident in our bisexuality, others have been dealt a different hand. I’m quite surprised you don’t know anyone who ID’s as gay and has admitted to you that they are really bi; I know dozens, and I’ve heard from other out and loud bisexuals that “gay” people come out as bi to them all the time.

      1. I’ve known a few people who have said that they thought they were gay – but learned/decided that they were really bisexual… but never anyone who was bi but passing as being gay and that’s because I don’t know anyone who would allow gay people to pressure them into saying that they’re gay when they aren’t.

        I’ve read here and other places where people who said they were gay and had been living as gays turn around and say, “Oops – I’m really bi!” but, of course, I don’t know them – but I also don’t find this as all that unusual because while gay folks would have us believe that they’d never “change sides,” it is possible, right?

      2. As far as “changing sides,” I think it’s usually more waking up to a side they had repressed. Many bisexuals talk about the “fluidity” nature of their sexual desires. Personally, I have not really experienced fluctuations in my desires, but it could be that fluctuating desires results in someone who thought they were 100% gay suddenly realizing they are not. Also, I always take notice whenever someone makes an adamant comment about themselves on any topic, often denial of something they see in themselves that is for whatever reason disturbing is what prompts this kind of comment.

      3. I tend to agree; sexuality isn’t as fixed as some would want to believe – but I still enjoyed your writing and I learned something today so thanks for that.

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